dreaming_dragons: Who Do I Call When I'm Broken And Bleeding?~ (mild breakdown)
[personal profile] dreaming_dragons
I'm just kind of fed up with people today, which says a lot seeing as I just had my 20th birthday about three days ago. Got a car and everything too. Just seems to go to show me that reality just likes to screw with me at random. If one friend isn't states away and too busy to talk [Which I understand, I'm just really, really lonely and my mood went from angry to moderately okay right back to depressed], the others are just...busy and not really talking to me much either. The only one that is consistently speaking to me needs a lesson in respecting boundaries; not to alarm anyone, it hasn't been overly horrible. Just annoying and difficult to deal with at times, seeing as my effort to not blow up by turning things into a partial laugh seems to have been interpreted the wrong way. That spark to kindling was pretty much what started off this whole downturn in mood, though with the majority of my friends here in school graduating and moving away, I guess I'm just feeling even more fatalistic as this comes closer and closer to happening. Kind of why I'm leaning more towards commuting next year; what's the point of coming back, really, if the place isn't as inviting as it once was?
I just badly need some hugs right now from someone I'm at least decently sure isn't trying to take advantage of me.

Thank all that is holy and decent for teddy bears and little brothers, the hugging toys for the people missing their pals. 

Also on a slightly less related note, has anyone noticed how when people made the Forever Alone face guy...thing, it looks like someone is crying while constipated. I mean, really, as a representative of the people suffering from loneliness and social anxieties, I think we deserve slightly better portrayal than that. 
How's this?

I don't know, I think this works pretty well for me. I kinda want to take up new residence under my bed every time I slip into a depressive sulk, like right now. Geez, brain, what with you needing to talk to people every five minutes and to some degree outright inventing people for me to talk to and be social with in the form of writing muses, one must wonder if I am, instead of an introvert, a very emotionally shattered extrovert trying to make my way in the world. Though given how I latch onto people, I would bet money on being an introvert, it seems more in line with their habits. 
And as for why I am using primarily Lilo and Stitch GIFs, they're the most expressive things in my life right now, and I kind of need a Lilo in my life. Or a Stitch, depending on which aspect of that friendship I would be fulfilling. 

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dreaming_dragons: Mirror Mirror What's Behind You, Save Me From The Things I See (Default)
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May 2016

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